Honest Woodcutter .... with a twist !!

One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river, his axe fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "Why are you crying?" The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water, and he needed the axe to make his living.

The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked. The woodcutter replied, "No."

The Lord again went down and came up with a silver axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked. Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."

The Lord went down again and came up with an iron axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked. The woodcutter replied, "Yes."

The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy. Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the riverbank, and his wife fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?" "Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"

The Lord went down into the water and came up with Jennifer Lopez. "Is this your wife?" the Lord asked. "Yes," cried the woodcutter.

The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"

The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to Jennifer Lopez, You would have come up with Angelina Jolie. Then if I said 'no' to her, you would have come up with my wife. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I am a poor man, and am not able to take care of all three wives, so that's why I said yes to Jennifer Lopez."

The moral of this story is: Whenever a man lies, it is for a good and honorable reason, and for the benefit of others.

Ford's Invention

Henry Ford dies and goes to heaven. At the Gates, St. Peter greets Ford and tells him, "Well, you've been such a good guy, and your invention ... the Assembly line for the automobile ... changed the world. As a reward, you can hang out with anyone in Heaven you want."

Ford thinks about it, and says, "I want to hang out with God Himself."
So the befuddled St. Peter takes Ford to the Throne Room, and introduces him to God.

Ford asks God, "When you invented Woman, what were you thinking?"
God asks, "What do you mean?"
"Well," says Ford, "You have some major design flaws in your invention:

1. There's too much front-end protrusion.
2. It chatters way too much at high speeds.
3. Maintenance is extremely high.
4. It constantly needs repainting and refinishing.
5. Every 28 days it leaks fluid and is rendered out of service.
6. The rear end wobbles too much.
7. The intake is placed too close to the exhaust.
8. The headlights are usually too small.
9. Fuel consumption is outrageous.

"Hummmm," replies God, "hold on a minute."
God goes over to the Celestial Supercomputer, types in a few keystrokes, and waits for the results. In no time, the computer prints out a report and God read it.

God then turns to Ford, and says, "You are 100% correct, my invention is flawed, but according to these statistics, more men are riding my invention than yours."

The purpose of this blog

You might be wondering why I started this blog in the very first place. The main reason was to create an archive sort of thing to store all the jokes that I read in Internet. The sources of these jokes vary from simple email, visit to a joke site ... to reading a joke in a forum dealing with something totally different from jokes.

I used to store all my jokes in this one particular folder under different file names. One day I thought of categorizing my jokes collection, which by the way is quite a formidable one. I tried doing it in OneNote, a brilliant note taking software from Microsoft. However I soon found out that one joke can come under several categories. So I figured out that I need something more than this.

The thought of sharing this collection with the world by creating a site with these was lingering at the back of my mind, but what I would have ideally liked to create would require a database running in background with lots of dynamic pages. This was too complicated to implement and moreover it would cost me a lot.

So I chose a middle path. I created a blog. Here I can label the same jokes with different categories and sharing is a lot easier. The only drawback being that everything is arranged by date. But I am quite sure that I will find a way around it sooner or later.